Mother refuses to cook kids and husband dinner after she comes home from work only to find a mess in the kitchen: ‘I can’t really do much in a dirty kitchen’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Feb 7, 2025 6:00 PM EST

Sometimes the only way to deal with weaponized incompetence is by forcing the incompetent to deal with their so-called 'inability' to fulfill their tasks. Don't give in to their attempt to make you do it, just let the task stare at their faces until it is absolutely impossible to ignore.

I know those of us who can't stand looking at disorder or a messy house find it extremely hard not to give up and clean the whole house by ourselves. But if we do that, those who live with us will forever seize the opportunity to do nothing, and will never contribute anything themselves. They would just let the house get messier until you eventually snap and clean it without them. No, we have to stay strong and make them understand that unless they start pulling some of the weight, nothing else will go their way within these four walls.

That is what the mother in the story down below taught her children and even her husband, who kept expecting her to cook dinner after they made a mess in the kitchen but failed to clean up after themselves.  

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  • Instead of letting it go and cleaning herself before making dinner, the mom here decided to play along with her family's weaponized incompetence. If they can't clean up the kitchen after they are done, there will be no dinner for any of them.

    Does this method work? Keep scrolling to find out by reading the rest of the tale.

  • "Now when I get home the kitchen is spotless."
    via dragana991

  • "Don’t Clean the Kitchen? Guess supper will be very late then."

    I have teenagers. And a hubby who works from home. I work a demanding job with fairly long hours, but I dont mind cooking when I get back as I enjoy
    via CourageOk299
  • it and can whip up a meal in under 20min if I need to. So the deal is, I'll cook & hubby and kids get clean- up duty. The problem is that they're all extremely
    via CourageOk299
  • messy and aren't at all bothered by a dirty, messy kitchen, whereas a dirty kitchen is the one thing that REALLY upsets me.
    via CourageOk299
  • So after a long, hard day at work, I'd get back to a filthy, dirty kitchen and have to clean it before I could start cooking. I got tired of nagging and
    via CourageOk299
  • screaming- it just elevated my stress levels. So I would get some food at work, arrive home, sit on the couch and read my book. After a while someone
    via CourageOk299
  • would ask what was for supper. I would say, "I don't know... I can't really do much in a dirty kitchen." And carry on reading my book. I would not end up
    via CourageOk299
  • cooking that evening as it got too late and everyone else would have to have cheese on toast - much to their disgust.
    via CourageOk299
  • Now when I get home the kitchen is spotless and the dishwasher on. Problem solved.
    via CourageOk299
  • Cheezburger Image 10464097024
    via Larisa Stefanuyk
  • brandonbolt Consequences for non- action. Why yell and scream when you can read a book. You must be my sister from another mother.
    via brandonbolt
  • avid-learner-bot I totally get where you're coming from. I've had similar evenings, but now I just leave a note for my kids: 'Clean the kitchen or no dinner.' Works like a charm!
    via avid-learner-bot
  • lilac_nightfall This isn't revenge, this is a lesson of natural consequences
    via lilac_nightfall
  • CoderJoe1 Like training monkeys.
    via CoderJoe1
  • KelsierlV KUDOS. They'll push you and avoid work as long as they can get away with it. You let them know that they can't get a way with it.
    via KelsierlV
  • I'm trying to get better at not using every dish in the kitchen when I'm making dinner. Then I end up cooking AND cleaning because my wife will refuse to help. LOL. I don't blame her.
    via KelsierlV
  • Chronic-Bronchitis As someone who loves to cook, this has been a major argument in my house and I have turned to doing the same things. The only difference is, if you cook
    via Chronic-Bronchitis
  • and/or use the kitchen you clean and leave it better than it was or I don't cook. The teens now either eat on their own dime somewhere else or don't eat. F them kids.
    via Chronic-Bronchitis
  • colieolieravioli This is awesome. It's not even petty, this is quality parenting. You made them all aware that if you want to eat,
    via colieolieravioli
  • other things need to happen. Teaching cause and effect is a beautiful thing. You teach it in these small moments that thinking ahead is crucial
    via colieolieravioli
  • Twin Tellula I had the same problem with my old roommates. Problem was fixed when I moved out so you can't win them all unfortunately.
    via TwinTellula
  • Danni_Les I love this power move!
    via Danni_Les
  • 4986270 Passive aggressive, I love it.
    via 4986270
  • PlatypusDream What weirdo doesn't like grilled cheese? Anyway, good job letting them have the natural consequences of their (in)actions.
    via PlatypusDream

Tags

family drama aita petty-revenge-reddit kids mother siblings wife reddit story petty revenge parenting husband family Reddit women parents children Father
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